Well, I hate to say it, but I changed the start date of my 30 days challenge from the 11th to today.  About 10 minutes after I posted my previous post, my boyfriend called me at work to say our home had been broken into and ransacked sometime after we left for work.  All of my deceased mother's jewelry is gone.  My laptop.  Electric guitar.  Our Playstation 3.  My tablet. The heirloom diamond my boyfriend intended to give me when he proposed marriage.  All gone.  Worst of all, our sense of privacy and security was invaded and damaged.  

So April 11, all I wanted was to get out of that house and into the wine.  I wanted to shut off the fear and insult and loss; to escape the confusion and chaos.  I forgive myself.  I will stand up straight and dust myself off, and start again today.  And in the future, perhaps I will be stronger and more able to handle struggles without needing to lean on the crutch of a thick, numbing wine buzz.

We took the day off yesterday to piece the house back together and try to clean away to filthy feeling of a stranger rudely invading our home, violating it.  I take a great deal of comfort in that my cats and dog are unhurt; I can't imagine what state I would be in if he (She? They?) wounded them or stole them away; they are precious to me.  My chihuahua is so friendly she probably would have happily gone on an adventure, though my Maine Coon cat would have happily ripped his face off.  And our support system has been amazing; We are so grateful for every person who reached out in loving kindness to offer support.

Anyway...once again...Cheers to sobriety.

Today is DAY ONE!

So I decided to jump feet first: I'm beginning a 30 day detox and taking the 30 day challenge with OneYearNoBeer.com!!

I’m actually thrilled about beginning the 30-day challenge with One Year No Beer, and suspect I’ll continue on to the 90 days.  I am just ready to "clean it up", you know?  I don’t remember the last time I went more than a couple of days without a drink.  I don’t always over-indulge (Flash to the Dos Equis commercial: "but when i do, it's a whole jumbo of wine..."), but it has become a daily habit to uncork a bottle after work, and many weekends I start sipping around 1 or 2 in the afternoon.  It’s expensive, it’s a waste of valuable time, and I don’t feel good.  I want to be a better athlete (yoga and running) and complete several races this year.  I want to be a better partner to my boyfriend, be more productive around the house, and feel and look my best.  The moment is now to reclaim my life and stop giving away my power.

This challenge has me excited about my health and making good choices – it's exactly what I need.  Just telling myself I should cut back or take a day off wasn’t enough; I always gave in and said, "Meh, I'll do it tomorrow, FECK IT."  Now, it is a fun challenge, and I know I will succeed.  When it comes to a competition, even with myself, I am determined to come out on top and not give up! Cheers to sobriety!

So, in list form as to be completely clear as to my goals, here are my plans:

1. In regard to all that money I'll save by not stocking up on Yellowtail Shiraz or drinks when dining out?  For everyday I succeed in avoiding alcohol, I will deposit $5.00 into my savings account the next morning.  It's what I would've have spent on a drink/bottle anyway!  What a waste.

2. Speaking of dining out, I waste a lot of funds on that!!  And you know why?  I like to DRINK at restaurants!  Also, sometimes its nice to just have someone feed you without the clean up, and that's innocent.  So the boyfriend and I have committed to one date night out once a week.  It will be cheaper without the booze to jack up the bill, and hey, it's OK to slack a little once a week.

3. Exercise, exercise, exercise!  Not spending money on booze will also allow me to extra funds to do my favorite thing once or twice a week: HOT YOGA.  Talk about detox! I lose a gallon of sweat and find it so emotionally and mentally cleansing, as well.  As for running, I will continue to follow my Hal Higdon guidelines to prep for my New Orleans Jazzfest Half Marathon in October.  I'm committing yoga 1-2 times, running 3-4 times a week.  I know there will be times I can't workout, because I have to listen to my body, but that's also OK.  As long as I do my best.

4. Drink at least half gallon of water daily.

5.  No caffeine unless it is in the form of green tea.

OK - I'm off and running!  :) :) :)

Peace, love, and exciting possibilities,

Jen